Let them have CAKE!
DISCLAIMER: Poor taste to follow a post about death with one about oral sex?
Mebbe, but we all find our own ways to move past grief, so don't judge mine, k?
Besides, this is MY blog & I can write whatever I feel like. ;P
Some readers may recall that I kept track of how many times hubby & I had sex on my dayplanner and that the year-end tally for 2009 was 29... but what I didn't mention was anything concerning oral sex... specifically about receiving oral sex.
That number for 2009 was ZERO. It's still zero... and thinking back, I don't recall how long it's been since I last received any form of oral sex from hubby. Two years? Longer?
Dunno, cuz I didn't keep track that far back & honestly don't remember.
Why do I bring this up today?
Welllllll, some may not be aware, but a month ago, March 14, was Steak & BJ Day. No, hubby didn't get a steak or a blowjob that day. He was in Vegas, working. Or maybe he *did* eat a steak. Maybe he got a BJ, too. I don't know. Doesn't affect me either way if he received either one, really.
But last night, I discovered that today has been made special, too.
And it's been on my mind ever since I heard the news. Yes, even while working on taxes, 1/2naked at my desk most of the day.
So what is today, you may be wondering?
Why it's Cake & Cunnilingus Day!
... or Muffins & Muff Diving Day.
Or Pudding & Pussy Licking Day.
Or Candy & Clit Licking Day.
And I kinda feel LEFT OUT! Not because I will only get cake today if I go buy one for myself, and not because I won't have a mouth between my legs today to celebrate this "holiday" (since hubby is away on a mini-vacation with his ole frat brothers), but because I don't ever receive that treat on ANY day or for ANY reason... whether I'm shaved or bushy, freshly showered or sweaty, dripping wet, or any other attractive scenario inbetween that I could conjure.
And I'm thinking that's really kinda fucked up.
It's been a loooong time since I've talked about it on here, but I luv luv luv fellatio! And hubby is the recipient of that form of adoration and attention A LOT, sometimes as foreplay for sex, sometimes when sex isn't involved or even the possibility of sex at all. Sometimes, just as a teaser and all in giggly-giddy fun.
So, the problem here isn't that I don't GIVE enough in order to RECEIVE enough. The problem is that he's apparently not interested in dining at the Y at all. Ever.
I can't help but wonder (in a lot of respects & for several reasons), if something is wrong with me.
Confession: I've never had an orgasm from anyone performing cunnilingus on me - boyfriend, lover, hubby, or otherwise.
Hasn't happened. Not once.
WTF is wrong with me???
So I'm curious & request my readers to answer, if you will...
MEN: How often do you treat your wife/girlfriend/lover/etc. to oral sex? Do you ever indulge her, so it's just for HER pleasure and not about quickly moving onto sex or what you'll get in return? Is it just a chore to you?
WOMEN: How often are you treated to oral sex from your husband/boyfriend/lover/etc.? Are you only treated to it as a quick form of foreplay before intercourse? Do you usually orgasm from oral sex?
Yeah. Cake & Cunnilingus Day.
Why can't I have my cake and eat it too while he licks a little of my icing, all at the same time? WHY?!?!
*EDIT* 4/28/10
Professor Fate gave me a link to a buzzfeed(?) about this.
I thought it was HILARIOUS, so I'm adding it in...
Vagina cupcakes! LOL!!!
Readers, PLEASE don't get me wrong.
This is a sensitive subject (and possibly a TMI post) but I'm not looking for offers to "cure me of my problem" here, so spare me the "I'll eat you for hours" type of comments, people. I'm not interested in hearing it & will probably ignore you in my comment responses (yeah, when I ever get around to doing those again).
It's just not what this post is about, k? I asked some serious Qs above, would like some serious responses, and invite discussion. Please.
Mebbe, but we all find our own ways to move past grief, so don't judge mine, k?
Besides, this is MY blog & I can write whatever I feel like. ;P
Some readers may recall that I kept track of how many times hubby & I had sex on my dayplanner and that the year-end tally for 2009 was 29... but what I didn't mention was anything concerning oral sex... specifically about receiving oral sex.
That number for 2009 was ZERO. It's still zero... and thinking back, I don't recall how long it's been since I last received any form of oral sex from hubby. Two years? Longer?
Dunno, cuz I didn't keep track that far back & honestly don't remember.
Why do I bring this up today?
Welllllll, some may not be aware, but a month ago, March 14, was Steak & BJ Day. No, hubby didn't get a steak or a blowjob that day. He was in Vegas, working. Or maybe he *did* eat a steak. Maybe he got a BJ, too. I don't know. Doesn't affect me either way if he received either one, really.
But last night, I discovered that today has been made special, too.
And it's been on my mind ever since I heard the news. Yes, even while working on taxes, 1/2naked at my desk most of the day.
So what is today, you may be wondering?Why it's Cake & Cunnilingus Day!
... or Muffins & Muff Diving Day.
Or Pudding & Pussy Licking Day.
Or Candy & Clit Licking Day.
And I kinda feel LEFT OUT! Not because I will only get cake today if I go buy one for myself, and not because I won't have a mouth between my legs today to celebrate this "holiday" (since hubby is away on a mini-vacation with his ole frat brothers), but because I don't ever receive that treat on ANY day or for ANY reason... whether I'm shaved or bushy, freshly showered or sweaty, dripping wet, or any other attractive scenario inbetween that I could conjure.
And I'm thinking that's really kinda fucked up.
It's been a loooong time since I've talked about it on here, but I luv luv luv fellatio! And hubby is the recipient of that form of adoration and attention A LOT, sometimes as foreplay for sex, sometimes when sex isn't involved or even the possibility of sex at all. Sometimes, just as a teaser and all in giggly-giddy fun.
So, the problem here isn't that I don't GIVE enough in order to RECEIVE enough. The problem is that he's apparently not interested in dining at the Y at all. Ever.
I can't help but wonder (in a lot of respects & for several reasons), if something is wrong with me.
Confession: I've never had an orgasm from anyone performing cunnilingus on me - boyfriend, lover, hubby, or otherwise.
Hasn't happened. Not once.
WTF is wrong with me???
So I'm curious & request my readers to answer, if you will...
MEN: How often do you treat your wife/girlfriend/lover/etc. to oral sex? Do you ever indulge her, so it's just for HER pleasure and not about quickly moving onto sex or what you'll get in return? Is it just a chore to you?
WOMEN: How often are you treated to oral sex from your husband/boyfriend/lover/etc.? Are you only treated to it as a quick form of foreplay before intercourse? Do you usually orgasm from oral sex?
Yeah. Cake & Cunnilingus Day.
Why can't I have my cake and eat it too while he licks a little of my icing, all at the same time? WHY?!?!
*EDIT* 4/28/10
I thought it was HILARIOUS, so I'm adding it in...
Vagina cupcakes! LOL!!!
Readers, PLEASE don't get me wrong.
This is a sensitive subject (and possibly a TMI post) but I'm not looking for offers to "cure me of my problem" here, so spare me the "I'll eat you for hours" type of comments, people. I'm not interested in hearing it & will probably ignore you in my comment responses (yeah, when I ever get around to doing those again).
It's just not what this post is about, k? I asked some serious Qs above, would like some serious responses, and invite discussion. Please.
Art circa late 1800's by Mihály Zichy
posted by Lil Bit at 7:00 PM
21 Comments:
First off, let me say I'm sorry you are so denied. IMO, either he doesn't care for sex, his main pleasure is porn & masturbation or he's doing somebody on the side. Of course I have no clue, just what came to mind.
I learned many years ago that if I give pleasure, it is returned many times over. That's why I make sure my girl always gets hers and the more the merrier as far as I'm concerned. Once I got her off five times in a row. I usually finger her clit, but I also give her oral. It's not very often, but I enjoy doing it for her. (Note: Do it this weekend Tony) But no matter what I do, I make sure she gets off each and every time.
Well, I'll be glad to tell you anything you want to know in a more private message, but to answer your questions here...
I am a very oral person... Always have been. In fact, I've noticed through experience that not being allowed to perform orally for any of the myriad of possible reasons, does a number on my libido overall...It tends to make me question my partner's desire for me or the task at hand and that kinda kills the mood.
With that in mind, I also tend to get caught up in it... Sometimes I lose track of the fact that she may intend it to be part of a bigger picture... oops.
I can't help it. I like it.
A funny flip side... I'm not sure my wife likes it... I know it's done right & it gets her off... but it also seems to irritate her...
Hmmm.
I do know that she does NOT reciprocate without an act of congress or a small miracle...
Oh, one last thing... If I ever had to go for more than a year without being allowed to... I'd leave and find a different and hopefully willing partner...
I hope you have a better day... I just wanted to blow through the castle & I'm glad I did...
Haunt you, later...
Phantom
Damn girl damn damn damn damn damn
Sigh
MEN: How often do you treat your wife/girlfriend/lover/etc. to oral sex?
I can not recall the last time I had an orgasm with the bride that it was not preceded by me going down on her. No she will not allow me to get it any kind of way unless she has showered within the hour. My big bitch is she rarely lets me eat her until she cums. Sucks!
Do you ever indulge her, so it's just for HER pleasure and not about quickly moving onto sex or what you'll get in return?
See last answer. I would frickin love that.
Is it just a chore to you?
My fave act in bed, I prefer it to intercourse.
Good luck.
I love to give this special intimate kiss when I can but it is not always wanted by my wife. In fact, I am willing to give it A LOT more than it is wanted.
She is a bit self-conscious and really only wants it when she is shaved clean (but then she really LOVES it).
Nevertheless, I am happy to oblige her at any time, though I do not get much reciprocal action in return. You see, I don't call myself Get8More for nothing!
;p
P.S. Perhaps you should consider not giving him any oral action at all - then when he finally ask you why explain to him your own wants and desires.
I got nothin'.
Other than it's good to know the "special" day exists a day before my birthday. Which will make it easy to remember. If I ever find the opportunity to remember...
The best thing to happen to me lately was cumming from having oral sex.... oh yes.
However this is not the norm. My hubby will do it if I push him down there - like physically push him. However I had better have showered no more then 5 minutes prior to that and not have used the bathroom since - ugghhhh.
No, I do not get to come from oral sex - this hasn't been his thing since college. Yes, if it is done it is part of foreplay and very quick. Yes, I could use more, much much more.
Any girl I used to date I would inform them at the right time that any relationship I was in without oral sex would not work.
When I first dated my current partner she was fully into it but not as much these days.
I would do it all the time except she is reluctant to let me go down on her these days. She is very sensitive and can't handle it which can be annoying because I love doing it.
Something changed along the way I don't know what it is.
She has no problems with giving me oral if I request it.
Damn girl. I hate it for ya. Really hate it.
But I believe I've gone on at length on the subject. My only problem is I have no one to give it to.
And that? Really sucks.
Zero? Time to find someone else to dance with methinks.
To answer your question, every time. It's a pretty fair way to ensure both get to the party so to speak. And I don't expect the same in return.
Maybe try a new dance hall perhaps? ;)
In a previous relationship oral always preceeded intercourse and the lust of it increased my libido for the passion to follow. I like it a lot and am good at it. Have been complimented on it. Matter of fact the eroticism was so good I asked her to marry me but she said no. So there ya go, yup, straight to hell. But I think of oral as a natural part of fore play before putting it in.
How often do you treat your wife/girlfriend/lover/etc. to oral sex?
Two or three times a month.
Do you ever indulge her, so it's just for HER pleasure and not about quickly moving onto sex or what you'll get in return?
It is (almost) always about her. I am a guy. I can have an orgasm almost anytime or anywhere. She is a girl she needs more than a place, she needs a reason. It is rarely a quick foreplay stop. I usually head south to make her shiver. I like the control & power of it.
Is it just a chore to you?
I am sure it is a chore for her. :)
p.s. If some guy can or will "eat you for hours" he isn't doing it right.
A lot of guys do not understand the physiology. The don't have a clue about the power (or the sensitivity) of the clitoris.
He may also feel a wee bit threaten by your lack of oral orgasm.
I love giving oral, my wife just doesn't like getting it. I miss it a lot.
Wife doesn't ask for it, or only rarely. If she has a problem with it, it's that it's too intense and makes her orgasm too quickly.
And you should ask for it if you want it. Really.
My wife & I have been doing oral things for the last 10 and a half years and it wasn't until last weekend that I finally made her explode orally. Each time I was always telling myself this will be the time. It's hard work, ya know lol. Just like Marilyn Dean told Brooke in The Break-up, get the Telly Savalas then let him see another artist eager to paint her canvas...or however that goes lol.
Oral has been part of my sex life regardless of male or female. Personally, I find giving incredibly sexy with a woman and tolerable with a man. I find receiving outstanding regardless of gender as long as the interest is there and enthusiasm.
Seems to me that is a personal preference and has nothing to do with you, rather him...IMO.
I am curious as to his response when you bring it up. I wish I had words of wisdom. I will say that since I hit the big 40 I refuse to keep my mouth shut (so to speak) about what I want.
Good luck,
dg
oh baby if you come over I would go down on you for hou...(rereads post)
Dammit, I was never very good at this.
Maybe if you dressed up as an Xbox?
[note: A bold I is me, all others are generic male.]
Seven minutes ain't enough unless the has been a whole lot of foreplay.
Oral should be about escalating pleasure. Pleasure can only be escalated so far before an orgasm. And it has been my experience that the first female orgasms is the hardest. The second takes about a quarter of the effort of the first. The third takes about half the effort of second. I have never met a woman who wanted to have orgasms for hours. I have met very few who wanted to regularly go past five without penile involvement.
Most guys are all about the orgasm. That is why faking it so easily fools us. Every successful sexual act for us ends with an orgasm. Why should girls be any different. If you have said "I never cum during oral", why should he try. If you cannot cum, why invest the energy to try and make it happen. I understand it feels good, but back to the power of making you shiver. I am not successful if you don't cum. Why set myself up for failure, especially if I know I can make you cum while I am working on my orgasms.
The problem with differing sex drives is the partner with the lower libido controls the all sex
Say thanks buzzfeed
Eh. I guess you'll know my answer to this question... Never. My wife rarely/hardly ever lets my mouth get anywhere near there. Sure, I want to, but I've learned that I just can't force it on her.
MEN: How often do you treat your wife/girlfriend/lover/etc. to oral sex? Do you ever indulge her, so it's just for HER pleasure and not about quickly moving onto sex or what you'll get in return? Is it just a chore to you?
I always want to go down on my lover whenever we have sex... no make that whenever I can. And when we do have sex, eating her pussy is something that takes up maybe 50% of the sex. My favorite position is me on my back with her over me kneeling with her legs on either side of my head, by face buried between her thighs. I am in heaven, and so is she.
james
p.s. Of course I love to have a partner that is into giving oral sex as much as she is into getting it.
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